Ramayana Murdered

A young second generation Indian in the US was asked by his mother to explain the significance of "Diwali" to his younger brother, this is how he went about it...

"So, like this dude had, like, a big cool kingdom and people liked him.But, like, his step-mom or something, was kind of a bitch, and sheforced her husband to, like, send this cool-dude, he was Ram, to somenational forest or something... Since he was going, for like, somethinglike more than 10 years or so.. he decided to get his wife and his broalong...you know...so that they could all chill out together. But Dude,the forest was reeeeal scary shit... really man... they had monkeys anddevils and shit like that. But this dude, Ram, kicked with darts andbows and arrows...

So it was fine. But then some bad gangsta boys, some jerk called Ravan,picks up his babe (Sita) and lures her away to his hood. And boy, wasour man, and also hi! s bro, Laxman, pissed..... all the gods were withhim... So anyways, you don't mess with gods. So, Ram, and his bro get anarmy of monkeys...Dude, don't ask me how they trained the damnmonkeys... just go along with me, ok...

So, Ram, Lax and their monkeys whip this gangsta's ass in his own hood.Anyways, by this time, their time's up in the forest..and anyways...itgets kinda boring,you know... no TV or malls or shit like that. So, theydecided to hitch a ride back home... and when the people realize thatour dude, his bro and the wife are back home... they thought, well, youknow, at least they deserve something nice... and they didn't have anybars or clubs in those days... so they couldn't take them out for adrink, so they, like, decided to smoke and shit...and since they alsohad some lamps, they lit the lamps also...

So it was pretty cooool... you know with all those fireworks... Really,they even had some local band play along with the fireworks... and ! youknow, what, dude, that was the very first, no kidding.., that was thevery first music-synchronized fireworks... you know, like the 4th ofJuly stuff, but just, more cooler and stuff, you know. And, sodude, that was how, like, this festival started."

I found that funny, and...i really din know wat to post...so...thanx for your time :)

Signing off...